March 11, 2012 was the date that I created this blog and decided to name it toughnutocrack. After doing so, I never wrote anything in it. I was thinking of something that would kind of represent me as a person and what came into my mind was this sweet-smelling nut that’s covered with a really tough shell and has a cream-colored edible thing in it. I don’t remember why I didn’t write after I made this blog. Perhaps, I got too busy with my job. I graduated in April 2012 and I met Kevin (my current boyfriend) and so many things happened. I didn’t have a family, not just yet. 🙂
After Multiply sent me an email that they were transitioning to just being a marketplace and will no longer be hosting blogs, I remember transferring my old posts to…. see, I can’t even remember. I think that was blogspot. Yes! It was blogspot and if my memory serves me right, I deleted those blog posts, eventually. I was a maintainer of my blog, blogs even! When I was young, I felt like there was so much to write about and one site or blog site was not enough. I love to write and it manifested early. Then, it just died out. I remember a couple of years ago, I was lying on the bottom deck of our apartment bed and just reading my old blog posts. I wrote about my love affair when I was a College freshman. It was in Iloilo City. I met a musician guy in church, through my friends. We were in the same dormitory, as freshmen. It was one sweet love in the mountains of Miagao and we shared our love for music. I thought it was the perfect thing until I found out that he’s cheating with a close friend of mine. A lot of my blogs revolved around our love story. I also wrote about my group of friends, we called ourselves “the hamham family”. We were from different provinces and cities and we were in the same dormitory. They are still my friends right now. In my old blog, I wrote just about anything, even though, they were not even interesting to read. I wrote how I feel and they were mostly not interesting. It wasn’t that difficult to delete them because it was, kind of, me saying goodbye to my immature self.
Today, I am going to go back to blogging because I know that my mind and heart has grown. I know and feel that there are many great things coming up for me in line with the many changes that have happened in my life. I’ve never been in a relationship this long (we just turned three last March 14), I’ve never written for someone else on a very personal level, I haven’t felt this relaxed even though I am a working student (currently a junior student of law) and something is just knocking on my heart’s door telling me to blog. Because of my writing job for Jen, I am able to read different kinds of blogs and comment (helps increase traffic) and I realized that blogging doesn’t have to perfect. Blogging is actually a choice that you make, a decision that you would love to share to the world what you have, that your value your life to make it worth recording. Someday, our blogs will be the only means that people can reconnect to us. It might be the legacy that we will leave behind.